How to Write Good

We don't know where this came from, but some is derived from William Safire's Rules for Writers.
*Always avoid alliteration.
*Prepositions are not words to end sentences with.
*Avoid cliches like the plague—they're old hat.
*Employ the vernacular. Eschew ampersands & abbreviations, etc.
*Parenthetical remarks (however relevant) are unnecessary. Parenthetical words however must be enclosed in commas. It is wrong to ever split an infinitive. Contractions aren't necessary.
*Do not use a foreign word when there is an adequate English quid pro quo.
*One should never generalize.
*Eliminate quotations. As Ralph Waldo Emerson once said: "I hate quotations. Tell me what you know."
*Comparisons are as bad as cliches.
*Don't be redundant; don't use more words than necessary; it's highly superfluous. It behooves you to avoid archaic expressions.
*Avoid archaeic spellings too.
*Understatement is always best. Exaggeration is a billion times worse than understatement. *One-word sentences? Eliminate. Always!
*Analogies in writing are like feathers on a snake.
*The passive voice should not be used.
*Go around the barn at high noon to avoid colloquialisms.
*Don't repeat yourself, or say again what you have said before.
*Who needs rhetorical questions?
*Don't use commas, that, are not, necessary.
*Do not use hyperbole; not one in a million can do it effectively.
*Never use a big word when a diminutive alternative would suffice.
*Subject and verb always has to agree.
*Be more or less specific.
*Placing a comma between subject and predicate, is not correct.
*Use youre spell chekker to avoid mispeling and to catch typograhpical errers.
*Don't repeat yourself, or say again what you have said before.
*Don't be redundant.
*Use the apostrophe in it's proper place and omit it when its not needed.
*Don't never use no double negatives.
*Poofread carefully to see if you any words out. Hopefully, you will use words correctly, irregardless of how others use them.
*Eschew obfuscation.
*No sentence fragments.
*Don't indulge in sesquipedalian lexicological constructions.
*A writer must not shift your point of view.
*Don't overuse exclamation marks!!
*Place pronouns as close as possible, especially in long sentences, as of 10 or more words, to their antecedents.
*Writing carefully, dangling participles must be avoided.
*If any word is improper at the end of a sentence, a linking verb is.
*Avoid trendy locutions that sound flaky.
*Everyone should be careful to use a singular pronoun with singular nouns in their writing. *Always pick on the correct idiom.
*The adverb always follows the verb.
*Take the bull by the hand and avoid mixing metaphors.
*If you reread your work, you can find on rereading a great deal of repetition can be by rereading and editing.